MIS-MANAGEMENT COMMITTEE:

Master:          *Justin Henry -766-4694              Betty Agostini, Flash Boos

Hash Ass:        Risa Mohammed - 752-4447                       ArleneValdez, Ronald Mc Donald

Hash Ca$h:      Lorin Paton – 622-5806 (O)                      Hash Booze: Nevie Boos – 637-3033 (H)

On-Sec:       **Mumtaz Amarali -  625-3617 ext 29436       Hash Softies: Richard Marlay –  351-3694

Hare Line:       Michelle Girod – 622-2204 (H)                    

Web Address:  http://poshashhouse.tripod.com                   *email address: Justin.Henry@ghl.co.tt

                                                            **email address : mamarali@republictt.com                                                                                             

       

                                                 Justin’s Junk

                   

 

The run at Flannegan town was great. The fact that Zam, carded to be one of the hares, was unavailable through injury no doubt had a positive influence on the hash. Apparently our spirits were a bit too high, and our party disturbed the wildlife around us and a complaint to the police was lodged (and surprisingly acknowledged). Thanks Pete for the kegs. Gifts like that are always fully appreciated.

 

Two Points: Hashers, I’ve received a lot of support this year and for that I’m grateful.

Just a couple points below

 

Hares, please be sure in the future to have garbage bags and be willing to lend a hand in the run-site cleanup. The committee will lend a hand, but are not solely responsible. Your cooperation will be greatly appreciated

 

Also, when appointed to scribe, please do not let this process be any longer than the tap on your shoulder to get your attention followed by the HM or Assistant HM uttering the phrase “You, Scribe!” I am not interested in your level of literacy, amount of time or willingness to scribe. You show up to runs that are always organized, with beers/food on sale for your convenience, and gladly read the trash of the previous week, therefore when asked to assist with this 1 task please comply immediately.

 

These points do not apply to the majority of you, but for 1 or 2 individuals that make things a bit more difficult than they have to be.

 

Welcome to the virgins!

New Shoes: Martin (a rather dubious accusation, but still taken in fine hashing form)

Leaving us soon: Sid and Manuela, we wish you well and see you guys again soon

Poofter: I tried to get Barbara Paton, I really did, but her behavior was impeccable! Famia for stealing the HM’s beer, despite the free drinks; Robert, a virgin, for choosing to do the run in a pair of Reef Sandals. I do believe he came in before Richard Hart though, despite the footwear; Dave Aitkenhead, for being interrupted while masturbating during the run, by Dave Morand and Lynette looking for a suitable place to fornicate. I’m unclear right now regarding why only Dave A was chosen to be penalized for this series of events; Sid & Manuela for sweetly kissing each other on the lips and interlocking their arms to take their going away down-downs; and the winner Richard Arrindel for generously donating a case of beer to the HHHMMM Anniversary Run, which had been expired since April, 2003. Luckily he was not forced to drink it!

 

Announcements: What do these things have in common? 6th Cruise payments, Passport Copies, Emergency Name and Contact Numbers. They’re all due now! No deposits by end of June and you are not cruising. It’s that simple! Your cruise balance should be up to $6,000 per person by end of June. Remaining balance is due at end of July.

 

FIRST EVER WORK CLOTHES MONDAY RUNA live run with both the hares and runners wearing work clothes

Ladies Business Suits, Blouses, Work Skirts, Van Heusen shirts, Gabardine pants, ties, shirt jacks, shirt jack suits… (sneakers allowed) 

Run Site: The Corner Bar, #20 Ariapita Avenue (cor. Gattica & Ariapita)

Date: June 23rd, 2008         Time: 5:15pm

September 1st is a public holiday and a HHHMMM Run Day... so we're thinking of something different

A live Run in Tobago and day at the beach after

 

Plan is

·         Board Ferry in the morning

·         Lime

·         Reach Tobago

·         Lime

·         Board Maxi to run start

·         Lime

·         Live Run Ends at beach

·         Lime

·         Board Ferry in evening

·         Lime

·         Reach Trinidad

·         Lime

·         Go Home

·         Bathe

·         Sleep

Drinks inclusive package works out to roughly $300, but need names of interested people ASAP if we're to stand any chance of blocking ferry tickets. Remember this is a long weekend... Get names to Martin, Keith or myself over the next two weeks....

 

CAN FOOD DRIVE - WALK WITH CANS AT RUNS AND GIVE TO CHRISTINE LYONS OR HASH COMMITTEE MEMBERS – FOR A WORTHY CAUSE

 

DIRECTIONS TO THE NEXT RUN #695

DATE:       June 28, 2008

HARES:      Dhoti Toti plus Memsahib

RUN SITE:  Santa Cruz

TIME:      3.30 p.m.

 

Travel along Saddle Road until you reach Cutucupano Road (sign "Lee's Hardware" here).  Turn into Cutucupano Road (left - if you are driving from Maraval or right - if you are driving from San Juan) and drive for further 1.3 km until you reach  Sosconusco Road Number 1 (sign "Nigel's Mini Mart" here).  Turn left into Soconusco Road Number 1 and continue onto run site at the playing field.

 

RECEDING HARE LINE

RUN#  DATE            HARES                                                        SITE  

695    June 28           Dhoti Toti  run – CHALO CHALO  

696    July 12            Big Dicks

697    July 26            Chris Mawer

698    Aug. 09            David Morand

699    Aug. 23            Brian Dookie   

700    Sep. 06            Alan / Justin / Jerry

701    Sep. 20            Vin & Michelle

    Sept. 27 – Oct 5     Hash Overseas – Cruise  

702    Oct. 04            Marlon Newallo

703    Oct. 18            Simon & Natalie

704    Nov. 01            Martin Griffith & Ronald McDonald

705    Nov. 15            Dave Blunden & South Posse

706    Nov. 29            Susan Hale & Ghislain Agostini

707    Dec. 13             The Bimbos

708    Dec. 27

709    Jan. 10, 2009

 

 

 

 

 

 

RUN #691 – Speyside       Date : Friday 23, May 2008                     Hares: Nevie, Dave Blunden, Victor, Puddy et al

Scribe: V.S Naipaul Jr.

 

Disclaimer: I wrote this trash all by myself.

 

After waking up with a terrible hangover and vague memories of drinking ten beers before the full moon run and taking tequila shots in Shades after, I thought to myself that I wasn’t going to have any beers before this Speyside run. After a hearty breakfast those good intentions were forgotten on reaching five feet of the cooler. Around one o’clock, the serious hashers decided to leave the cooler and meet the bus for the long journey up to Speyside. As I waited in the bus I hoped that this run would be set better than the moonlight run where our esteemed Hash Master started off as a hare but somehow ended up finishing the run last.

 

The drive was long but scenic. We passed a number of previous Tobago run sites before finally reaching the hash site. We were all grateful that the hares were merciful enough to start this supposed A to B run at the top of the hill instead of the other way round. The hash started promptly at half two with the hares wearing some ridiculously oversized t-shirts for no real reason. The hash started off pretty poorly with the whole group being led up a false trail which didn’t make much sense.

 

Not long into the run certain male hashers were seen stalking a tattoo even though the hunting of wild meat was not allowed around this time of year. Whether they actually caught anything is another story. After a twenty minute scramble in the forest, we were led to the road where the real downhill descent began. Some hashers purporting to be real athletes starting complaining about how running downhill hurts their knees. What a sad bunch!

 

For some reason, the road didn’t seem to be that long when we were driving up but as we were running down, it seemed to go on forever. Half way down the hill, two arrows pointing up a dirt side track were seen. We followed the arrows only to find out later that all the dirt tracks were false trails and the real trail was back out on the road. Again these false trails had no real point but they did manage to kill my motivation to do any more running. At this point, I just wished the end was near.

 

We were finally led off the road to a side trail. We passed a haunted house then went down to a dry river bed and then back to the road. At last, the ON IN was in sight at the bottom of the hill and hash finished on the lovely King’s Bay. We were all especially happy that Roger Hart had finished the run and did not get lost this time. Then again he did take extreme precautionary measures by dressing like a fluorescent traffic cone so he could be easily spotted in case he took a wrong turn.

 

Not to be outdone by his brother, Richard Hart was seen trying to impress Barcelona by telling her he owned half of Trinidad, a fleet of boats, two houses down the islands and that he was a master chef. Still he didn’t manage to impress her.

 

We waited about half an hour before the beers finally arrived at the beach. The hash master was demoted from performing the down down duties and instead Gerry was put in charge. Our HM was then proclaimed the ‘Drunken Master’ for his antics on the moonlight run and then made to pay for his drunkenness. Mike McGee had to do a down down for new shoes which belonged to someone else and were about seven years old. He seemed to enjoy it though since not one drop of beer was spilt.

 

The conspiracy to pick on the Paton family on this Tobago weekend (for no apparent reason) started to unfold… Lorin was a late overwhelming winner of the poofter jersey for being a so called closet Chelsea fan. This was probably sour grapes on the part of the real Chelsea fans that were still a little bitter after Man U’s great victory in the Champions League. I would also like to take this opportunity to say sorry to the unlucky lady who took the bullet for Hanif when she managed to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and got a disgusting wet poofter t-shirt thrown straight in her face. And to think that this was her first hash as well. Don’t think we will be seeing her around again.

 

After the beers ran out, the hashers got on the buses for the long drive back to Johnston’s. Our bus driver must have been in a hurry to get home because the only stop he made on the way back was to let Giselle be sick on the side of the road. Some advice for Giselle for the next time she wants to get carsick, please time your throwing up when the bus is in close proximity to a bar, that way instead of watching you be sick, we could have a beer instead. You really know when you are experiencing some good Tobago hospitality when a man does not mind you puking right in front of his house and another five hashers pissing on his front garden.

 

Back on the road, the driver still did not bow to the pressure to stop at a bar but instead he drove at full speed on a road with more dangerous curves than Femia. By the grace of God, he did manage to get us back to the hotel safe and sound. All in all, this was another great Tobago hash and thanks must be given to all the people involved in making it happen.

 

Disclaimer: I wrote this trash all by myself.

 

PS Thanks mom.

       GERRY’S GARBAGE

 

An innovative move by HM Justin to use former Hash Masters to conduct down downs at the various runs, or was it simply a pre-meditated plan as he knew he would probably be too stoned to do it? Either way, it was thoroughly enjoyable. Yours truly officiated at Run # 691 on Friday set by The Brainless Morons…..I mean Nevie, Dave Blunden, Victor, Puddy et al at Speyside. A good A to B run ending at King’s Bay with a long drive from the hotel with no beer stop in sight. Eventually Mossy begged for a beer/pee stop and the driver obliged. Hashers arrived at the site complaining of feeling sick, some thinking they had just stepped off the T&T Spirit.

The one thing that didn’t go quite right was the late arrival of the beer. However, in the absence of the beer, those of us frolicking in the sea drank in the fine forms of the sexy Ms. Mahabeer as she entered the water, especially Dos, who was dribbling and foaming at the mouth.

The beer eventually arrived and the hash hush called by Justin as he introduced me to some objections from a few old farts in the crowd who wanted to know what I was doing up there. To you, I say yuh mammy. First up was a re-christening of Justin from HM to the Drunken Master aka Jackie Chan performed by Martin. Then came the hares, followed by Victor who got the first new hat down down for his monster cap which he was using as a pick up line on the women, asking them “you want to see my monster?” To which the reply was inevitable – “he looks like he is asleep…..or dead”. There were two new shoes awards, one to Mc Gee though his shoes were not new but borrowed, it was determined that they were new on him. Harold drank his first beer in a year for his new shoes – he was later seen drinking scotch all weekend. Virgins Neva and Paul were welcomed and duly initiated.

It was then on to the poofter. No surprise here as all the usual suspects were called. First Forrest Gump for being the only hasher to buckle up on the maxi, then doing double duty as he short cutted on the on-in but still could not “win” the hash (this was to be repeated over the course of the weekend) clearly a leading contender. Not to be outdone, Tweety was overheard trying to impress Barcelona by telling her of his big house on the hill, boat and car in Barbados, all of which of course belonged to Roger. Victor was up again, this time for deserting the injured Peg Leg to bus a tackle on Seema promising her an endless supply of monster for the weekend. Next up, the hares, for leading the entire pack on a false trail, and last but not least, the Chelsea fans for supporting a shit team.

It was a close affair after Victor got eliminated and a runoff was about to be done, when Hanif offered up his buddy Lorin who is in fact actually a closet fan. He was immediately called up and won hands down, starting a memorable weekend for the Patons that is likely to continue to the next run.

Another mainly uneventful drive back to Johnsons with no beer stop. We did manage to arrange a vomit stop for Janelle though and Dookie swears that that was the sexiest vomit he has ever seen!

 

A truly memorable weekend lacking only two things – a pool and music, The former, we did not have, the latter, curtailed due to the complaints of the residents of Room #32 who did not want any noise or crowds in the vicinity of their room, despite the fact that they requested a ground floor room in the all inclusive party block Ocean View section. The bar/pool area has always been in this area, and as a result, the popular liming area. In years gone by it was even in Randal & Christine’s veranda before the days of the big cooler! DUHH – people, the Tobago hash weekend is not a vacation, particularly for non hashers. We are here for the serious business of drinking, hashing and liming (not necessarily in that order). If you want peace, quiet and R&R, make the obvious choice – Garden View Block, Crown Point Hotel or Speyside! Yuh cyah be playin’ mas and fraid powder. The whole hash cannot be made to suffer, either on the trail of off, due to the whims and fancies of a couple people. As a former hash master myself, you try to accommodate people as best you could, but you also have to consider everyone else.

I do hope that future hash masters take note and act accordingly.

Justin, I’d like to echo the sentiments of the others by saying hats off to you and the Committee, for a well organized, great weekend.

 

PS: E.D. . Stumpy’s Hardware said you can return the plywood, 1 by 3’s and nails that you bought and get a refund since you did not use them.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~On On to the Cruise!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

 

RUN NO:  692

HARES:  Justin, Tim, Eric, Ronald, Tosca + 2 locals

DATE:  Saturday, May 24, 2008

RUN SITE:  Moriah, Tobago

SCRIBE:  Tantie Merle a.k.a Miss Maraval

 

Radio Talk Show Host:  Good Morning caller – Do you think Dr. Rowley has committed political suicide?

Miss Maraval:  No, I don’t think so.  I think the old style politics of yesteryear is changing to a more democratic, no-holds barred style.  Politicians, party loyalists, activists and lobbyists are speaking out more and letting their voices heard.  The political landscape is changing and a new paradigm is blowing through the country…  But I want to tell you about what happened to me on the Saturday Hash in Tobago

 

Now you know I am a member of the Hash (the drinking club with a running problem or is it a running club with a drinking problem?)  anyway, we went to Tobago for the long Corpus Christi weekend and the Hash Master Justin asked me to write up  the run for the Saturday in Moriah.   I said ok but I regretted it after because when I got back home I had to deal with a son sick as a dog with the virus, a wedding and an after wedding shower etc. but what I do remember is that on that Saturday I knew it was going to be one of ‘those days’  because hear what happened…

 

I walked into my hotel room to get ready for the run and I bounced up with the cleaners in the room and one of them looked at me and said:  ‘But eh, eh, you is de lady we see yesterday?”  I was surprised but I answered “Yes….”  Then she said:  “Yes, is you self, yuh had yuh hair slick down and yuh was wearing a sexy pom-pom shorts- yuh was looking real good …”  So of course I said  “Yes, it was me…”  But when they moved onto the porch I heard one of them say:  “But look, dat woman dey is de one we talkin’ ‘bout!”   They were talking about my neighbour in the next room and mistaking me for her….Oh well, it was nice to feel nice even though it only lasted 5 minutes…..

 

Next on to the bus destined for Moriah – no hoax calls to Justin on this trip – he caught on to the joke early o’clock because any and everyone was calling him anonymously trying a fix up a date (even men!).   Famia in the meantime was thinking up of another hoax to pull on him…  So the bus ride was pleasant in sunny weather, not as long as the day before and we arrived at the site set in a big quarry surrounded by mountains.. We start to get worried….  It was blazing sun and Hashers tried to find shade anywhere – behind buses, behind tall people like Justin and Sonja  etc….The numerous Hares also added to our concerns.. They were sporting sponsored ‘Monster’ t-shirts (Monster is a new sports drink).  After they gave their speeches we were glad to be off.  Everybody spread out on the huge expanse of the quarry site… not a clue, not a trail to be found, until Christine got a hint from a hare and trudged up the hill we came from on the bus leading us in the right direction which was to the left into the bush and forest.  If you like being a Boy Scout or hiking, well this Hash was for you… We jumped, skipped, slipped, struggled, puffed, plummeted , ducked, scrambled, limbo-ed, hurdled over bush, bramble, brush, bamboo, streams, up hill, down hill….whew!   Hello!  The young people were able but the old people like me were disabled…. I and the other shortcutters, made a very wise decision to shortcut at the end and reached back at the site hot, sweaty, thirsty and tired..We welcomed the bottled water given out by Sonja.  We watched the other runners come in with Martin who was proud as punch that he came in 1st and he let everyone know it too!  So back to the buses for a change of clothes and then drinks at the bar.  The liming was lively with an added treat of corn soup being served up. 

 

Justin passed the mantle on to Betty for the Hash Hush …Magee was a sight with his duct-taped running shoes (they were running on empty!) Hutchy getting plenty picong for getting stuck in a pineapple patch when he tried in vain to overtake or shortcut …..Victor holding on a bunch of pink flowers he picked on the run which matched his bright pink outfit….But when the Hares had to do their down’downs a strange thing happened, they all suddenly began busting out of their t’shirts just like ‘de Hulk”  and all this was deliberate, much to the delight of the crowd...  Poofter went to Alastair for asking his mother (me) to help him write up the Trash when Justin asked him to do it.  Poor fella! Anyway he took it well just like Cassandra who drank from her filthy new shoes like a trooper…

 

Well, time to go back to the hotel and we were happy as pappy with the lively banter on the bus, but I happened to notice that when we passed certain areas there was no electricity… But the bad news was when we arrived back to the hotel – yes, you guessed it – no electricity..Anyways, after groping and fumbling around the room, lights finally returned about 20 minutes later.. then to dinner…

 

So there was how the Saturday was spent or what I remember of it – what you think about all that Dale?   Hello?   Hello?   HELLO?!!!!

                                                          

                                                                 HASH QUIZ

 

1)      Who was the Hasher that brought his girlfriend over to Tobago on Saturday and then discovered that his bedroom door was taken off its hinges and gone missing?

 

2)      How do you think he and his girlfriend spent the night?

 

                                                 Justin’s Tobago Junk #691 & 692

                   

 

Tobago, Tobago, Tobago… Definitely some interesting stories:

  • Hash Master renamed to Drunken Master
  • Richard Hart, of all people, a hare donar
  • Lorin a Chelsea fan…who would’ve thought??
  • Paton family members feeling unfairly targeted
  • Room doors going missing in the middle of the night
  • One of the soberest people on entire trip, throwing up on maxi
  • A mysterious knee injury that’s tied to the rotation of the earth on its axis. Present by day, absent by night
  • And strangest of all, 11 cases of beer left back at end of trip

 

Tobago 2008 is behind us and it was great. Thanks to everyone that made it possible. The entire hash committee, the hares, ex hash masters and product suppliers really chipped in to make it a success; Thanks to every hasher that was there that lent a hand when it was needed, from helping pack the beer cooler to opening a beer for your hash master and most importantly, for just coming out to have fun, talk some rubbish and enjoy the weekend.

 

Looking forward to seeing you on the cruise.. 6th deposits due next month!! And balance Due by end of July. Every cent of this trip counts so please pay promptly to ensure prices remain more or less constant. Passport photocopies are also due urgently and please don’t forget the extra TT$225 if you haven’t paid it as yet!


 

 

 

 

 

 

Tobago Hash May 2008

Weekend Review          Scribe:  Refreshed

 

What can I say about this year’s Tobago hash? Just what the doctor ordered: sun, sea, rest and drinks of course. It all started when a selected but exclusive few chose to travel by boat.  The sailing was good, thank God, because I don’t know how Ash would have feared, still recovering from the sailing the week before.  Several games were played and it seemed that we were off to a good start and an exhilarating weekend.

 

Except for some minor adjustments to rooms, the usual water lime ensued at Store Bay on Thursday afternoon with beers in hand, such that the HM was renamed ‘the drunken master’.  The live run that evening had an interesting turn about as Martin and the now DM went off a bit sluggishly, the latter running in slow motion.  Somewhere along Milford Road half way into the run, everyone stopped only to see Harti take over from the DM who could not continue due to his imbibed state.

 

Friday began with a Yoga class by the good natured Cassandra.  Several persons seemed to have alternative planned itineraries, what is the TBG hash coming to: golfing, diving, snorkeling, what next?  Nevertheless, we were packed into the buses very early to depart for our first run had by Victor, Nevi, Puddy & Blunden.  Along the way Dos and Sema had to run like Forest to catch the bus. We began before the announced start time which evidently pissed off Father Chatfield, whilst others got the wrong directions, or so they say.  Anyway, on my account it was a long walkers trail with a long run in on the road at the end, bit boring and seemed to miss something.  Yeah! probably the beer truck at the end since we had to wait half hour to revive ourselves!  So, mango chow was the only alternative.

 

Saturday morning – Yoga class with Cassandra again. More golfing, diving and now triathlon! Barcelona, Diane and some Tobago cyclist registered for the relay and placed first. Congratulations! Then on to the next run had by Eric, Ronald, the DM, Tim; too many to remember all the names, but all I remember is the Hulk finish or was that monster, with some ‘j…zees’ or an excuse to be bare chested for the ladies!  So much McGee thought he would serenade the crew also with a Monster ball song.  Nevertheless, the run was an improvement on Friday: no barbed wire at least!

 

The most significant event of the weekend was the well orchestrated removal of a door…room unknown…probably one of the best pranks I’ve seen in a while.  Anyway, we’ll keep that in the shade as we danced the night away before returning to sail back early on Sunday morning.  What a refreshing weekend!  On On to the cruise!  A well organized weekend, the H..oops…DM took advice not to reinvent the wheel.  Great job!

 

 

 

Tobago 2008 Overview

By Tall Dark and Havesome

 

Ahhh… think of Tobago and you think of tranquil waters and relaxation. Think of a hash weekend in Tobago and you think of beer beer , beer more beer and then some more beer.

The group was truly representative of POSHHH, a mottley crew.

 

Thursday morning most of the group journeyed across either by plane or some by boat. The plane crew was very subdued or even apprehensive at least until we landed in Tobago and Hanif in his own inimitable style outlined the purpose of a wife. The Anglican priest sitting behind him just smiled at the colour of his language. When the presence of the priest was brought to his attention he replied “Oh gosh the Hash weekend start naaaah”

 

This year apparently wives, fiancées and girlfriends handed out visas. From Hash Master right down to midwife Derek, got visas. Derek’s was quickly revoked as he had to return home to deliver a baby.

 

Thursday was a “do what you want day” and the HM and many others did what hashers do best, imbibe copious amounts of beer. A particular Ex HM imbibed so much that he was tackling females, and rumour has it, some males, hands down, or was he trying to get their pants down. The “Tiger Woods wannabees” went to knock the shit out of a white ball for approximately six hours.

  

During the day a little man, not a short man, was sent  up Forest Gump’s behind to insert a GPS. Night soon came and it was time for the night run, a first in Tobago. The run was set by Martin and Justin who was slightly inebriated but assured all gathered that he could set the run. To cut a long story short the hares were caught and there on the main road in Bon Accord there was a hair hare transplant. Justin who has hair was replaced by the more athletic Hart, not the one with the GPS up his behind, who has some hair and so the run continued and Justin came in last. Justin’s placing was as a result of his giving in to the strong urge of wanting to give his phone number to everyone that he met. At the end of the run a couple Ex HMs and a few Old farts decided to give Justin his Hash name so the sobriquet Hash Drunken Master was selected for him. Some one said we could also call him Jackie Chan who acted the role of Drunken Master since his, Justin’s eyes get small when he gets drunk. This too was another first. First HM to get severely intoxicated on the Tobago weekend. Yes I know there have been other HMs who got drunk, but not as drunk as this time.

 

Friday morning came and there was more drinking until the Maxis arrived. The run was set by a bunch of accomplished and novice Felchers (see Blunden for meaning) The run was a decent run and was also the unveiling of Forest Gump’s fluorescent attire. More will be said about the run by another scribe but suffice it to say that Forest did not get lost and also did not come first even though he short cutted at the end. He was monitored for the entire run and was again taking a turn towards Storebay after the ON IN but he was quickly called back.  When the Hashers came in there was no beer truck, another first. The beers eventually arrived. At the Down down ceremony, by the power (sic) vested in Martin and Gerry, Justin was christened “DRUNKEN MASTER”

 

Dinner was served and Dookie again did not get any coleslaw because it was not part of the menu, so we were spared his tantrum at least for this year and neither did he displace the vagrant who sleeps on the bench outside Royal Castle. This was also the night that a door went missing and another hasher woke up to find ice in his bed, maybe the Aircon was too high. This all happened in the same room. The room was apparently occupied by people from the Arima Door Centre so by the next night a door was obtained and installed. This incident interfered with real estate agents attempts at surveying a particular property.

 

Saturday again saw more drinking until maxi time. Some of the group went to the Triathlon to cheer on Dianne and Ms Barcelona. I am pleased to inform that Dianne and Ms Barcelona won the triathlon, congrats to them and their cycle partner. The run was set by ‘T_O_B_G_ F_CK_RS wanna buy a vowel” at least that is what their shirts which they eventually put on said. Prior to putting on their shirts they appeared topless and informed us that one hare named Peg Leg did not contribute much. I was a bit amused at the appropriateness of the name “Peg Leg” as it  has certain pirate ring to it and the hares certainly did look pirates who had buried their chest.

 

More will be said about the run by another scribe. I must however indicate that halfway through the run Forest exclaimed “Ah man up meh ass” Apparently Dookie, who was in charge of the implant operation did not retrieve the man. Forest returned to BHHH with not only the GPS but also the little man up his rectum. Forest, you may keep the GPS, the battery life is ten years and Linda will decide what to do with the man.

 

Another first on the weekend was the Poofter shirt being monopolized by one family and rumour has it that the female side of the family will happily accept it next run to make it a hattrick. The future addition to the family I am sure will not be averse to wearing the shirt, after all she will soon be part of the family.

 

The return to Johnstons was a dark one as electricity was interrupted or in Trini vernacular “current went” A phone call to the man with the most current on the hash was made and it was not too long before electricity returned or “current come back”. Dinner however started serving by the light of the moon and a couple torchlights.

 

Saturday night was Shades night and a large contingent of young in age and hart heart went out and partied. A male Hasher got lucky. The boat crew left early as their boat was 8:00 am or something like that.

 

Sunday morning came and with reduced numbers, hashers started coming out, some in anticipation of the run to be set by the “Bat Ears Morocoy” who did not turn up until later the morning so the run did not come off. So the next on the agenda was the stag party and I am not talking beer. The party went on for at least five hours and many hashers were soused at the end. When the party moved from the sea to the garden area two female hashers were very merry and one was even giving lap dances to selected males. All of this going on while Numbnuts trying to earn brownie points was reading a book on a lounge chair with his wifey. The title of the book “The Hard Guy”.

 

Then the joke of the day was Numbnuts dialling a number and starting a conversation and only after not getting answers to his questions from the party on the other end his son then took the phone from him and said “Dad yuh talking to the voice mail”

 

It was then time to start heading to the airport to return to our homes, the end of another Tobago Hash weekend. Those of you who were not there, you missed a wonderful weekend, but you were not missed.

 

Weekend Highlights

 

ü      Zam slept in a different room every night. I wonder why?

ü      Every day of the weekend a group had to Go Out to  Lime on Fairways

ü      Forest did not get lost as we appointed hashers to look after him on each run, but the truth be told it was easy to  keep an eye on him so we could not lose him in his fluorescent outfits.

ü      Forest came second two days straight. He was a poor representative of BHHH

ü      Lap Dancing on Sunday

ü      Disintegration of the Hares shirts on Saturday

ü      Father Mike missing the run

ü      The Reverends wife giving a hare a tongue lashing

ü      Again a hasher put his meat on the grill and forgot what he put on.

ü      Ash put beer in his barbecue sauce and said that is how he like to drink his beer

ü      There was no skinny dipping as the chunky dunk group was larger than the skinny dip group.

ü      Blunden’s discourse on the pros and cons of felching.

 

 

Topic of the weekend

 

The topic of the weekend was Viagra and its potency. The following question was asked.

 

If one Viagra gives you an erection for four hours what will half a Viagra give you?

            Would it give you:

a)      Half an erection for four hours.

b)      A whole erection for two hours.

 

If you cut the Viagra horizontally  and take the front half of the Viagra would you only have an erection on the front half of your manhood?

 

If you cut the Viagra horizontally  and take the back half of the Viagra would you only have an erection on the back half of your manhood?

 

If you cut the Viagra vertically  and take the left half of the Viagra would you only have an erection on the left half of your manhood?

 

If you cut the Viagra vertically  and take the right half of the Viagra would you only have an erection on the right half of your manhood?

 

Ahhhhh so many questions. Anyone with the correct answers would get a subsidy on their cruise price and a week’s supply of Horny Goat weed.

 

HAVE A SUPER WEEK AHEAD!